I’m scared of blogging!

Carnival of Souls

It's a lot like this.

I’m sitting in front of one of the most intimidating things I ever see on my monitor.

A blank page.

It’s my job, as the owner of this blank page, to make it not blank anymore. Fine. The only problem with that is that it paralyzes me with fear. What if no one reads it? Worse yet, what if people do read it… only to tell me how stupid it was? What I have difficulty with is keeping those words on the page. I’ve written hundreds of blog posts over the years, only to choose “cancel” over “submit” when I was done. I simply don’t think that anything I do is good enough or interesting enough to warrant someone seeing or hearing it. The number of times I’ve recorded stuff and deleted it has to be in the thousands now. So I create stuff, and then destroy it before I’ve given anyone the chance to tell me it sucks. Ultimately, I want very desperately to make something. I consider myself to be a creative person; I’m just trying to find the right medium to get that out. Music is one way that I’ve experimented with, and still do… but I can never seem to get out exactly what I hear in my head. I spent years drawing, only to have the same thing happen. It just never looked like it did in my mind’s eye, so I eventually quit trying and moved on. Aside from film-making (which I’m realizing I actually do have an interest in) the only things I have left are cooking and writing. Seeing as how I’m much less likely to burn anything down or accidentally slice my face off by writing, here I am.

Tomorrow I’ll start writing like myself.

3 thoughts on “I’m scared of blogging!

  1. I’ve been blogging for a few years now, and my best advice is to just write for yourself. To hell with everyone else. Write because you want to, because you need to. If you pour enough into it, people will come, and some will stay.

    Also, don’t pay attention to your analytics. When traffic starts to go up, you will get really excited about blogging. When traffic falls back down to normal, you will feel crappy about blogging. Don’t pay attention to the stats. Just write for you.

    For whatever it’s worth, I’m enjoying what you’ve got so far.

  2. Thank you very much for the comments and the kind words of advice! I think you’re absolutely right; in the 4 days since I started this blog, I’ve obsessed over my analytics and have already felt that small rise and fall associated with those numbers. I’m definitely going to take your advice. Thanks for checking me out!

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